pregnancy loss Archives - Seeking God with Jaime Wiebel

Hope When Life Hurts Most and Sitting Among Friends #48

Jaime Wiebel — Wed, 26 Oct 2016 05:27:00 +0000

Thank you for join me for this mini-series honoring mothers and father for National Pregnancy Loss and Miscarriage month. If you have missed any of the posts in this series you can find them here.
An Unexplained Loss, It’s Time to Surrender, and My Garden Prayer

So often we want to be in the Lord’s will meaning we want God to do what we want Him to do for our benefit.

As I was on my knees before the Lord, I said, “Lord, not my will but yours be done.” I had never prayed in this manner before and never thought I would be praying this over the lives of my babies.

But here I was, seeking the Lord’s absolute will and only asking for the peace that only He can give.

We can ask a lot of questions and He may be willing to give us answers but sometimes our why or why not are to understand that God is Sovereign. That He rules and reigns over all.

He wants us to know that with all of the modern technology, there are not always definitive answers and with all of the modern technology, God’s decides the beating of a heart.

Why? Because Then the LORD God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life and the man became a living being. Genesis 2:7

The LORD breathed into man the breath of life and through the life of Job we are reminded And he said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.” Job 1:21

The Lord decides when to give life and He decides when to take it away.

I promised the Lord one thing that day. No matter what, I will love you.

And I do. With all my heart and not because he gave me what my heart desired but because He rescued me from myself through it all.

I had been the prodigal daughter and He was waiting with open arms for me to come running to Him and He knew what it would take. This was it.

A couple of weeks ago as my kids and I were driving on our way to school, they asked me, “Mommy, why did the babies die? (Keep in mind this is going on eight years ago. But they know they have a brother, sister and another baby in heaven.)

I told them it was because God wanted them in heaven with Him. Why they wanted to know. My only response, Because He wanted me back more.

I don’t know God’s plans for my life. I don’t pretend to know what it is that God processes or thinks. His ways are higher than mine and I praise Him for that.

What I do know is that when God loses one of His children. When the Good Shepherd has lost one of His sheep. He will go after them. Sometimes in ways that are beyond our comprehension.

Being the Good Good Father that He is, it is for His glory and for His kingdom gain.

I can tell you, had my life not been affected in this drastic way, I probably would not be sitting here today with you.

Although some questions are never answered, we can walk in faith that God Knows and it goes according to His plan. We can trust that all things flow from His goodness.

To answer some of my questions, He did.

Why? Because He is sovereign. He is above all and in control of all and even when it all seems to be falling completely apart, He holds life in the palm of His hand.

Why? Because He has us sketched in the palm of His hand and no one, not even ourselves, will snatch us away.

Why? Because His plans for us are to draw near to Him where we can be protected and lead to walk in His path so we can know the great Love that He has for us in every situation.

Would I get to hold their little hands and kiss their sweet little feet? No. In fact, I wouldn’t get to see them at all. Their handprints and footprints were given to me right after they were delivered. You wouldn’t believe how small and oh so perfect they are.

We named our little boy Noah and our little girl Faith. The week I had to “think it all over” gave me a chance to process some of what happened.

What I have are the memories held together by the peace of God that has surpassed all of my understanding. The memories of what God did for me so I would know how to praise Him through it all and to love Him no matter the circumstance surrounding my day.

Their lives were fragile. All life is fragile and precious and we should look at each day as the gift that God meant it to be. We should live for praising God in this moment and leave tomorrow to deal with itself.

Noah and Faith have been the rainbow at the end of the rainy day that brought me back God.

I would love to say it was that easy. One week and that was it. Like everything we are a process in which God needs to work in our lives. Although God worked mightily in that week, I am still learning what God wants to teach me.

The important part is I am learning with Him by my side.

Your story may not be anything like mine. But God can work in the same way.

God can give us peace when life is beyond our comprehension. He can give us life when we are threatened with throwing it all away to be more like this world.

He can stop us in our tracks to get our attention and reroute our current path.

No matter what, we can be assured of this, God loves us very much and in this world, we will have trouble but in Christ Jesus and what He did on the cross we can have hope and peace.

We can have hope in the midst of our circumstances, heartbreaks, trials, daily lives and most importantly when life hurts the most.

Christ died so that we may live and live this life to the fullest. We get so much grace and mercy poured out on us that we can have an overflow to pour out onto others.

If you would like to talk about how you can know Jesus as your personal Savior, please email me. youresewtrendy@gmail.com I would love to have this conversation with you.

Please visit me in the comments below. Let me know what things you are facing right now that may need prayer. Please encourage us and let us know how you have been an overcomer through Christ Jesus.

Many blessings to you and the rest of your week.

Also, if you are encouraged by this and other articles you read here, could you please share this with your friends and family. I would love for them to join us.

I would love to connect with you on social media!
You can Find Me at the Links Below!

Jaime Wiebel – Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Google+

This week’s featured friend is Susan Shipe from
Hope Heart Home
I have learned a lot about Susan through the comments. I love that she encourages and shares her wisdom and her heart with other bloggers. This is a place where real conversations can happen and I appreciate that she hangs out there. On her site, Susan offers hope from her heart to yours. She has several 31-day devotionals available from Amazon. Read More about Susan here.
Thank you so much for the encouragement every week, Susan, I am glad you are here!

While you’re here, sit down with some of my friends.

WOW! Thank you all for coming here and for the 72 Amazing posts from last week. This party has been wonderful and it is thanks to you, friends, who link-up with us and those who stop by and read and SHARE! Thank you!

You all are amazing writers who share Family and Faith, DIY’s, Recipes, Photos, Giveaways, Homeschool and more. Many of you have amazing journeys of faith and I praise the Lord we are able to connect here!

There are easy share buttons to your left or at the bottom of each post (mobile) and after you link-up. Thanks for sharing!

Thanks! From all of us at #SittingAmongFriends

*** Joining Us Here? You are welcome to join me on Pinterest and Pin to Our Sitting Among Friends Blog Party Board where I will be happy to re-pin posts to my other boards. ***

An InLinkz Link-up

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My Garden Prayer

Jaime Wiebel — Wed, 19 Oct 2016 07:59:00 +0000

It was Wednesday and in the hopes of pursuing “life as normal”, I went to church. I was my son’s class teacher and I thought we could use the break.

When we got to the church, I felt the urge to go to the sanctuary to pray.

For the first time in my life, I felt the urge to be absolutely broken before my King and He called me to my knees.

Don’t get me wrong, I had cried out before to the Lord in desperation. But I had never come before Him when He has called me to surrender.

I had before me an un explained loss and I thought I would come for answers. Wouldn’t you know it, when you bend your knee in surrender, He is willing to give you a few.

Tucked in the pew, on my knees, I looked at the cross that hung at the front of the church. As I began to shudder in tears, the words poured from my heart.

Heavenly Father,

I don’t understand. Please help me to see. I know you and only you can make the tests wrong. You can prove to everyone you are a miracle worker.

I know I have strayed far from you and I am sorry.
Lord, only you know what happened, only you can make their hearts beat again.

Lord, only you know the outcome of this and can see how this is going to end and so now I want to surrender myself and my babies to you.

Lord, if they are sick, if they could not take this world then thank you and I love you for taking care of them and keeping them in your loving arms. Lord, they are far better off than I am.

If you want me to take care of them, Lord, I would be honored and I will do what I can to be a good mom.

I am asking, Lord, in this moment that you do your will, not mine, but yours. If you are willing to take this from me, then I will promise to do my part in caring for them.

If it is your will, then I promise to love you no matter what your decision.

Over and over, I prayed. Over and Over, I submitted my will.
Not my will but yours be done. I promise to love you, no matter what.

As my heart wrenched, I said, Lord, I ask for one thing. I ask that you give me peace beyond my understanding.

I walked out the sanctuary and into the rest of the week.

Friday came. We went for another ultrasound. The results. No heartbeats. As the doctor attempted to explain the procedure, I told him, I knew what they needed to do.

Because of the procedure, I was not able to see them. In an attempt to protect me, it took two grueling days.

I can’t explain my heartache but I can explain the overwhelming peace that was beyond my understanding.

The empty places in my heart that were reserved just for them, is filled with the love and peace of God that only He can offer.

A couple of years later, I was doing an in-depth study on the life of Jesus. What I saw in looking at my own past I, too, moved by the spirit, had my own Garden Prayer.

Before Jesus endured the cross, He went to the Garden of Gethsemane to pray.

As His soul was consumed with sorrow to the point of death, He fell facedown to the ground before His Father and prayed.

“Abba, Father,” he cried out, “everything is possible for you. Please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” Mark 14:36 (NLT)

Then after returning from the disciples.

He went away a second time and prayed, “My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done.” Matthew 26:42 (NIV)

God the Father could have taken the cup from Jesus. God could have chosen a different route. But Jesus bent His knee and will to His Father.

They knew it was the only way. He was the perfect and final sacrifice needed to bring us into a perfect relationship with the Father.

But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds, we are healed. Isaiah 53:5 (NIV)

Why would He suffer?

For you and me!

So we could be brought into peace before our Heavenly Father. So we could be healed by His wounds.

Your story may not be the same as mine. But we have all suffered. In John 16:33 Jesus tells us in this world you will have trials and sorrows, but take heart, I have overcome the world!

Next week, I want to offer you more Hope that comes from healing and comfort from the Lord in our times of brokenness, hopelessness, and suffering. Please return for the final piece in this mini-series.

Before you go, leave us a comment. Have you had your own garden prayer? Have you had times in your life of utter brokenness and you were brought into peace through Jesus that you want to share?

Also, if you are encouraged by this and other articles you read here, could you please share this with your friends and family. I would love for them to join us.

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It’s Time to Surrender & Sitting Among Friends #46

Jaime Wiebel — Wed, 12 Oct 2016 04:44:00 +0000

Thank you for joining me for this mini-series in honor of National Pregnancy Loss and Miscarriage Month. I hope you enjoy it and I hope it encourages your heart.

Shocked, could be the word to describe this unexplainable loss. In a matter of one minute, I went from having two babies to have none.

Why did I need to think this over? What was there to think about? I just wanted it all to go away. The hurt, The overwhelmed feelings, the confusion, the… I didn’t know what.

I wanted to remedy the situation immediately but because of a previous emergency C-section to resolve this immediately would put my life at risk because of the stage of pregnancy I was in.

One week. I had to wait. For the right doctors to be available. One week.

There I was, sitting curled up on my bed with no answers. They tried. They were twins and they are fragile. But those answers didn’t satisfy me.

I had wanted certain answers. How did they miss this? Why, with all the modern technology, did they miss this? Why? Why? Why?

I felt so many things. I felt outside my body watching the whole thing happen to this person I thought I recognized. I was certain that everyone around could sense my pain and they were all looking at me. With no words just empty stares.

The pain and the hurt, as if my heart was torn into a million pieces. I had suddenly grown a heart for not one more but two.

Would I ever get to see their faces? Hold their tiny little hands? Count their bitty toes? Kiss their little bellies?

Prayers of desperation. Prayers of dedication. Prayers of cooperation.

I had them all.

At this time in my life, I had created some distance between God and myself. Sure I could play the “good Christian Girl” but I was busy. Busy with life. Busy with my control. Busy being who I thought I was. Just busy.

Through all the tears, I decided to curl into my Bible. Certainly, God would have a word for me.

Then I came across this verse.

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Prayer, I could do, but can’t we all when things get tough? Finally reaching out to the God I had pushed far from my heart.

Sure, I could serve on Sundays and Wednesdays and to be honest give good lip service. My real life, my real heart, they were mine and I was okay with that.

With Thanksgiving. How would I be thankful for this? I didn’t even understand it.

Make my requests known to God. I certainly could do that. Make their little hearts beat again. Make the ultrasound wrong. I have faith, well, all I needed was a tiny mustard seed, right?

Peace. That is what I wanted. No, really I wanted my babies. I wanted to hold them and watch them get big and crawl and walk. I wanted to take them to school and love them.

Promises I made. Promises. I negotiated with God to be the best mom if only I had the chance.

God had different intentions for me and my life. Just as He does for all of us.

It is called surrender.

My life had become my own.

I am in no way suggesting that God was punishing me. Although the thoughts crossed my mind. I had a rocky past, I had a selfish present, and I certainly couldn’t make any promises that I would be better than this in the future.

God, in His perfect love, is a God of perfecting love.

What I am suggesting is God knows what will bring us to our knees. It is not the same for everyone.

But for me, it was this.

One Week. The time I had to think this over. The amount of time God needed to bring peace to my heart and surrender to my life. His Timing is always perfect.

For the first time in my life, I surrendered, not only myself but my babies.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

Please come back next week to read “My Garden Prayer”. The prayer that helped me be lead to Peace and eventually Praise God in all His Sovereignty.

Then I hope you return the final week of October, I will offer the hope and peace from the only source I know it truly comes from – from My Lord and Savior – Jesus Christ.

Also, if you are encouraged by this and other articles you read here, could you please share this with your friends and family. I would love for them to join us.

I would love to connect with you on social media!
You can Find Me at the Links Below!

Jaime Wiebel – Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Google+

This week’s featured friend is Elizabeth from Just Following Jesus. Elizabeth has a fantastic site. She offers encouragement through her daily walk with Christ. She has recipes for your soul and has regular posts of gratitude for her life. A list that is really fun to read. Thanks for stopping by every week, Elizabeth. I am glad you are here.

While you’re here, sit down with some of my friends.

WOW! Thank you all for coming here and for the 66 Amazing posts from last week. This party has been wonderful and it is thanks to you, friends, who link-up with us and those who stop by and read and SHARE! Thank you!

There are easy share buttons to your left or at the bottom of each post (mobile) and after you link-up. Thanks for sharing!

Thanks! From all of us at #SittingAmongFriends

*** Joining Us Here? You are welcome to join me on Pinterest and Pin to Our Sitting Among Friends Blog Party Board where I will be happy to re-pin posts to my other boards. ***

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An Unexplained Loss and Sitting Among Friends #45

Jaime Wiebel — Wed, 05 Oct 2016 05:20:00 +0000

It was December 2009, one week before Christmas. I had been so excited to go to the doctor to do what every new and expecting parent gets to do, have an ultrasound.

I had decided to take my mom and dad because my dad had never gotten to go to an ultrasound before. We were so excited as we quickly jammed into the extra small room that happened to be the only one left at the clinic.

As the tech apologized for the really small room but we were so excited to see the sweet little faces, feet, and hands of that new little person that we didn’t care if we had to squeeze into a closet.

Of course, all eyes are on the screen except mine. Mine were on this amazing group of people that had come to celebrate this day: my husband, my little boy, my mom and dad, and the tech (I’m sure she was excited). We waited eagerly to hear those first sounds that all moms and dads long to hear.

That precious heartbeat. The sound is a symphony to a mom’s ears. When you hear that sound, oh, how your heart melts.

Feeling and hearing the signs of life, your heart grows a little bigger to have a special place for that little one.

Then the LORD God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being. Genesis 2:7 (NIV)

This particular day was different. As I looked at the screen, I noticed two little bodies lying feet to feet. Cradled in the lower part of the womb God created for them.

I couldn’t believe my eyes. Two? Really? Mine?

As my excitement grew for two littles. I looked at the others in the room and they looked as surprised and confused as I did.

The looks and the excitement quickly faded as I looked into the tear-filled eyes of the tech.

That precious sound we so desperately waited for was not there. No heart beats. No movement.

The moment everything changes. The moment your dreams of holding and loving the precious little darlings you knew from deep within for the first time is quickly snapped away. Your spirit is crushed like nothing you ever knew.

I insisted that the tech was wrong. We had just heard at least one at the last appointment. I asked her to get the Doppler. Maybe. Just Maybe. That would work, after all, it picked up a heartbeat the last time.

The doctor came in and verified they were not viable. Their hearts break with mine as they recommended I take some time to think about this.

I didn’t understand. How was it, I was in my twenty-first week of pregnancy and they missed something? Like a whole other baby or the fact that there was something wrong.

Now, they wanted me to go home and think about this for a few days.

The feelings are none that I can explain. The loss of two little darlings at the same time. Unexplainable.

Because I was as far along as I was, it was considered a pregnancy loss. Meaning, I had to make some decisions about what would happen to the babies.

So I had to wait. I was left with few answers and an unexplained loss.

If you have gone through this or a miscarriage (I also had a miscarriage right after this pregnancy loss), I know the pain is so great. I want to say to you, I am so sorry. I don’t know if there is any greater heartbreak than losing a child.

I didn’t mean to fly through this story but my story doesn’t end there. I will share more of it next week.

Before you go, know that there is hope and I hope I will be able to encourage you through this experience.

My rest and my hope came from Jesus and I want to encourage you to lean into Him. Next week, I will talk to you more about how I did just that.

If you are at a place where you need some hope to move you to a new place, I hope you will come back. I know our stories are not the same and no one has the same exact story or feelings but I want to encourage you more.

Quick Fact: October 1988, President Ronald proclaimed October as National Pregnancy Loss and Miscarriage Awareness Month.

I want to use this opportunity to be able to encourage you with my story.

The comfort I received from Christ was not to be kept to myself but to encourage others.

He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. 2 Corinthians 1:4

Whatever your situation, please do not feel like you have to face this alone. Please seek out someone that has been in your place or seek online help resources. Also, if you ever need to contact me for encouragement or a conversation you can contact me at jaime@jaimewiebel.com

Also, if you are encouraged by this and other articles you read here, could you please share this with your friends and family. I would love for them to join us.

I would love to connect with you on social media!
You can Find Me at the Links Below!

Jaime Wiebel – Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Google+

This week’s featured friend is Jill Holler from changedbyhisgrace.com
Jill is a good friend of mine. I love to have opportunities to have conversations with her because they always lead to real conversations about Jesus. I am excited to feature Jill here this because she just had her devotional book release. You can find Jill’s guest post on this recent blog post where you can comment for a chance to win a copy of her book here.

While you’re here, sit down with some of my friends.

WOW! I know Summer is busy so I thank you all for coming here and for the 82 Amazing posts. This party has been wonderful and it is thanks to you, friends, who link-up with us and those who stop by and read and SHARE! Thank you!

There are easy share buttons to your left or at the bottom of each post (mobile) and after you link-up. Thanks for sharing!

Thanks! From all of us at #SittingAmongFriends

*** Joining Us Here? You are welcome to join me on Pinterest and Pin to Our Sitting Among Friends Blog Party Board where I will be happy to re-pin posts to my other boards. ***

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